Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Brief Encounters

"Goodbye, pants," I say wistfully, putting them in the bin.

Saying goodbye to a faithful pair of pants is always a sad occasion, but part of growing up is accepting that sometimes you have to face up to the reality of binning them, instead of shoving them to the back of the drawer in denial. With most of the undercarriage in ruins and long-limp elastic increasing the hazard of wedgies, there’s nothing glamorous about the now-tatty pants. Some people choose to recycle them – giving them one last outing in a new incarnation as a duster or somesuch. Whilst I suppose it would be nice to be reunited occasionally with a trustworthy pair of pants – to reminisce over the good times as you polish your shoes – I don’t think I could thrust the ignobility onto a favourite pair. It would be a bit like when football legends prolong their careers for payday after payday after payday, until eventually they are waddling around the pitch like some doomed wounded animal. No, not for me and my pants.

With heavy heart, I go to buy some new pants.

5 comments:

Dancinfairy said...

Ahhh I have a pair of 'lucky pants' and the material has sadly started to come away from the elastic and I know that they have to go but I just cannot let go. They were with me on all of my big moments in the past 5 years, including the day I got married, and so they will live in my drawer forever. They have the added bonus of being cute and having cherries on them so the bin would be too cruel. How do we get so attached to these things?

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

I had to do a good bye to pants the other week. Most were on their last legs, but I still couldn't bare throwing them out. Same goes for bras. Nightmare. I cling onto them knowing that they're rubbish.

Meanwhile... said...

Thank you. I may take a leaf from your book. Otherwise, the consequences could be compromising.

Blue soup said...

I hope your new pants serve you well.

I bought a new pack of little thongs the other day. Now I have a cut just at the top of my bottom crack.

:(

New pants are crap.

Huw said...

That must have been a tight thong.