My lower eyelid begins to twitch one evening. The following evening the lid under the other eye has started to fidget of its own accord too, and the original eyelid is tensing itself uncontrollably. On the third day I meet Curly at the pub, and find myself having to avoid his eye, lest he thinks I am winking at him. Over and over again. Very quickly.
I come home and consult an internet doctor page.
"Blepharospasm is the medical term for when your eyelid muscles repeatedly and rhythmically contract," I slowly read, managing three or four words inbetween each not particularly rhythmical twitch.
"The most common causes," continues the internet doctor page, "are fatigue, stress, and caffeine."
I blush a little when I think how late it was when I got up that morning, and think fatigue probably has to be ruled out. But I concede I do have a lot on my mind lately. I suppose I could be a little stressed? I remember back to when I was writing my undergraduate dissertation, and recall the same thing happening then, but on a much less intrusive scale. So that would seem to fit the stress hypothesis.
I read on, and see that prolonged twitches could be an indication of neurological damage, or even epilepsy. I feel myself getting a little stressed out about this and both of my eyelids begin to twitch like a bunny rabbit’s nose. I decide the best thing to help ease my stress levels would be a nice cup of tea.
I go to the kitchen and put on the kettle. I reach for my teabags and then pause.
The past few days I’d had a sore throat, and had been drinking numerous cups of tea to help soothe it (and to also activate those gamma delta T lymphocytes, of course). The tea provided relief whilst it was being drunk, but soon afterwards my throat would once more feel raw again. Having found myself marching back and forth to the kettle, at some stage I’d decided that I’d save myself a lot of time if I just served the tea in pint glasses. Now, normally I’m a regular, but not excessive, tea drinker. However:
Sore throat + ingenious time saving tea drinking method = drinking as many as nine pints of tea a day.
My twitching eyelids go into overdrive as I calculate that these two factors that have recently been added to my tea drinking rituals mean I’ve experienced a 2000% increase in my caffeine levels in the past couple of days.
Sometimes I can be incredibly thick
5 weeks ago