Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Dog Tired

I was fending off the pack of rabid dogs with a wet towel. Short sharp flicks: that was the way. I tell you, it's all in the wrist.
I decided to focus on the largest one. Their leader: the snarling Alsatian, with saliva dripping from it’s snapping chops. I allowed myself a smile: I was actually winning! A couple more vicious thwacks to the muzzle ought to do it.
"You’re pretty zonked, eh?" said the voice.
I cast my eyes around; the dogs sensed my confusion. I was in danger of losing my advantage.
"Been a long day, has it?"
My head snaps back violently, and I lurch myself forward to grip the desk and stop my fall. I look into the eyes of the man sat next to me. Disorientated. Confused.
I realise where I am.
I am in the Naughty Room. At work. Testing a participant.
I have fallen asleep.
I nearly just fell off my chair.
"I noticed your head bobbing back and forth."
I cast my eyes down to the desk and the laptop: the screen showing me that the computer task is finished. How long has it been finished though? How long was I out for? I try and rack my memory to work out what the last thing I remember being displayed on the screen was.
It feels like a very distant memory. In truth, I am still a little surprised to find myself here. I thought only Grandads pulled these sorts of stunts.
"Shit, sorry, sorry. Have you been waiting a while?"
"Nah, it’s okay. Have you been at this for a long time today then?"
"Twelve hours," I mutter shuffling some already ordered papers and trying to flex my facial muscles to stretch my eyelids open. Twelve long painful hours. And at least another one and a half to go.

I hope I didn’t snore.


Ivy the Goober said...

I'm starting to feel stupid, Huw. Could you post a glossary for people like me? What's a naughty room? :)
I'm thinking I learn about a word a day from you - last one was swot! Will this make me bi-lingual? Guess not :(

emaleejayne said...

I agree with Ivy! A glossary might be necessary...uh useful I mean...for some people who might not understand....but I mean, like other people, because I understand everything you say, well most things....ok...can you post that glossary?

Jona said...

It's all downhill from here, Huw! Another few years, and those quiet afternoons will become the bane of your life, as you realise your body just can't be bothered to stay awake if there's nothing immediate and intersting to focus on ;o)

y-vonne said...

Try placing a rolled up piece of tissue (kleenex in Canada) over your left eye. That will prevent you from falling asleep while you work. :-)

Cheri said...

When I read "naughty room" I pictured seating in a round room, beads hanging from the door with a pole down the center.
Not that I would know.

I think he's just making up words to through us off.

I hope you get some rest, sleepy-head!

Daniel said...

I believe that if you're at work feeling tired, as long as nothing important (like an executive meeting) is happening, you should just sleep. Take half an hour after lunch and the entire country would be so much more productive in the afternoon.
Maybe I should start a campaign...

mona said...

if you had been there for twelve hours, you have the right to take a nap I say.
I always wonder if I snored when I fall asleep like that...I hate it!

Shane said...

Make up the results. Really, who's gonna know?!

Huw said...

Gasp!!! Scandal!

Cleavers said...

I have a friend with a black, soft leather couch in his office.

Might go nicely in your 'naughty' room.

OldHorsetailSnake said...

This is entirely too cryptic. What are you testing "the participant" for? Sleep apnea?